Dedicated To You

Its been almost a week since we have time together

but it feels like more than a week to me

just feel weird between us

and i've been keep thinking on what is the problem

but i just can't get it

I don't mind giving you time and space to chill

and I'm willing to wait for you

but the communications and meeting between us

just seems so weird and awkward

I just doesn't know what can i do to get rid of it

been trying to meet you up and talk to you

but i just doesn't have the chance to do so

even if i have the chance, when i see you

i just unable to say anything and just stare at you

i know what i did before might make you piss
sorry for not telling you problems i had that day
didn't mean to make you angry
but now i wish i can be there for you
to cheer you up when you are not in the mood

these few days was worrying

thinking about you all the time

how are you? are you ok?

missing and worry about you till i can't sleep well

but now that you replied

feeling ease a bit but still..

sometimes the status or post that you shared in FB

I thought that its for me but..

somehow, i might be overthinking
the awkward part is..
get to know what you want to tell me through friend
but not telling me straight forward
can't even talk to you without knowing what will happen
just scare it might worsen up the situation.

i might not be one of the important person for you

might not be the person you will think about

might not be the person you missed

might not be the person you love

all matters to me now is

you are everything for me and i want to be with you

Now was hoping to get back to the same as before

go out with you, try to make you happy

just hope relationship between us can be better

all i want is your attention, care and love

--  End  --

说出心里话之一

已经多久了

我都没用华文把我的故事写出来

太久没用了

感觉有点不习惯

可是我却能写出我想要写的

不必特地想去英文该怎么写

虽然是这样

我还是想多写英文

不管是写的，讲的

都想把它练好

那。。这篇就例外好了

在这里

只想写下的

就是为了要自己记得一件事

“付出 并不一定会被 珍惜”

为什么会突然提到这呢

是因为发生了好几次了

一次又一次的发生

连续下去会很累

还是谢谢上司给的意见

“虽然不会珍惜，但你有了经历和经验”

真的觉得这句说的没错

真的是得到了经历和经验

可是人呢就是贱的

到最后还是重复一样的错

另外一件事呢

最近有点烦到我

可是还是决定不理比较好

也没可能一直烦下去嘛

既然妳都表现出来了

那我就问妳什么事啦

可是妳却告诉我没事

如果掉转回来

是妳问到我什么事

我没说的话

妳就对我说类似发脾气的话

我能怎样呢

我问到你是因为担心，关心妳

这样的妳给我的感觉

就像是我一点都不可靠

是不？

算了吧

一切都已变了

对妳而言我已不在那么的重要了

才会有我现在这样的性格出现

忽冷忽热，像是又不是

睡了

明天要做工

--  The End  --

Troubles and Worries

Its been a long time since the last update

there is so many things to do and not much time to rest

now just straight to the main point

...

ever since I'm back from my 3 weeks trip

there's a lot of things (烦恼) that coming to me and bother me

all of it came in too sudden and i'm not ready yet

as for the side effect of it, tired with stupid "bad mood" look

but this does not affect my works as i will separate it clear and nice

one of the things that bothers me is... relationship

no matter friendships, family or love

the thing is, ever since i'm back from the trip, i felt something changed

its not that i think too much or anything

but i can feel it, i'm a lil sensitive for the word

::  Friendship ::

this is the weird things happen

friends, become more passions and somehow active

for some, i admit you've become more pattern than ever

but for some, suddenly find me back after a long period

so i will take this as a good things happen?

or the other way round?

Find me out and make me busy!!!

::  Family  ::

its weird for this too

because suddenly they treat me differently

totally different from before trip OMG

what is happening actually during CNY?

am i came back to the wrong world?

( .. am i still dreaming? slap me wake up please ..)

::  Love  ::

 the complicated one but lovable.. quite?
the only thing i get after im back from the trip is jealous and ignore perhaps
well, maybe jealousy not a big deal it all
can leave that out now because it can be deal easily LOL
but the sad thing is ignore
kinda sad when she doesn't reply the message
what i can do is wait for the reply
what i can do for all these is nothing
since she's not mine and each has our own life
just can stop thinking, do nothing and let it be
positive overflow LOL


there is still many things bothering me
but all other things just small matters which can be settle in no time
what else i can do.. hmm